Passionate Marriage

Authors: David Schnarch

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Key Ideas

1. Understanding the distinction between love and desire is crucial for maintaining passion and intimacy in a long-term relationship. Love is about connection, while desire is driven by individuality and separateness.

2. The concept of 'self-soothing' is important in cultivating a strong sense of self and reducing dependency on your partner for emotional regulation.

3. Developing differentiation is key to a passionate marriage. This involves balancing the need for attachment with the need for separateness and autonomy.

4. Sexual desire can flourish in a relationship when partners embrace th....
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Quiz

1. What is the key distinction between love and desire in a passionate marriage?

Love is about connection, while desire is driven by individuality and separateness.

Love and desire are the same thing.

Desire is about connection, while love is driven by individuality and separateness.

Love and desire cannot coexist in a marriage.

2. What is the concept of 'self-soothing' in a passionate marriage?

Reducing dependency on your partner for emotional regulation.

Communicating openly about your needs and desires.

Creating a space for erotic exploration.

Maintaining predictability and routine in the relationship.

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